My BIG wonderful Family!

I just got this picture from my Grandpa, it from his 80th b'day party that we attended in Puerto Vallarta, MX in August. We are in the front row on the left (click on it to enlarge). Pretty big family huh?! I so wish we could see them more often.

Updates

Well after much thinking and debate I decided to go ahead and pull Katie out of her school and start homeschooling her. The final straw was when I picked her up on Friday and asked her what she did and she told me "We had Spanish today and we had to watch Dora the Explorer - it was so dumb". WTH? I'm paying a very large amount of money for you to watch Dora?! On top of all other issues with her not being able to get help from her teacher when she needs it I just decided that was it. I went home and ordered her the curriculum I had been looking at and decided that would be her last day at that school She was thrilled with this decision and was so excited about it she was asking to do school work over the weekend. We are now about 5 days into it and I am SO glad I made this decision. I have seen more progress in her over the past week than I have in the past 2 months of her being in school. I have really been able to focus in on the areas where she needs to most work and tailor the curriculum to suit her individual needs. We've gone back to the basics on things like handwriting (print and cursive) to correct some mistakes that had started to become habits. It's been wonderful, both she and I are enjoying it a lot. I forgot how much I loved homeschooling, the only reason we stopped was because I was so swamped with trying to run Hip Monkey and a household with no help. What a difference having help makes. I feel like I have my life back and am not chained to worrying about the business 24/7 - which is NOT how I want my life to be. Anyhow, I decided to go with the Sonlight curriculum this year and am extremely impressed with it so far. They are based in Littleton (outside of Denver) so I ordered it on Friday and got it on Monday. It is very comprehensive and advanced. The 3rd grade math is stuff I remember doing in middle school! Seriously, they are working on basic algebra - finding "n" & multiplying and dividing fractions by the end of the year. Even Kevin was extremely impressed with it (and he minored in math!) The science program is also really cool and comes with lots of supplies for science experiments and even a DVD to help guide the experiments. This week we are growing radish seeds and Katie is keeping a journal of their progress and studying the whole life cycle and doing bar graphs to chart their growth. In addition to the great math and science, the curriculum is very literature intense and came with 3 huge boxes of books. They really go in depth into American History this year and the books actually make it fun and interesting. We are also doing the Rosetta Stone program for Spanish - a step up from "Dora the Explorer" I think. ;)
I also ordered the pre3/4 program for Kobe which was another huge box of books - all Caldecot medal winning books at that! He is really developing a love of reading and must have heard at least a dozen different stories in the past few days between me, Kevin and Katie reading to him. He is always carrying a book around and asking someone to read to him. He's also enjoying being a part of Katie's schooling and has so much fun helping with the science experiments.

I think we have finally found a good balance, I'm happier than I've been in a long time. I'm having fun teaching Katie, she's having fun learning and I'm positive she will learn SO much more this year at home with this new curriculum than she would have if we left her in school.

BTW - Hasn't Kaleb changed SO much lately??!

Oh no she didn't!

I'd say in doggie standards, our dog Lily has a pretty sweet life. She gets to come in or out at her pleasure, has 2 acres to run and play on, always has a full bowl of food and water, gets yummy leftover food scraps in her bowl daily, goes with us on trips and hikes and we even allow her to sleep in bed with Katie. She gets tons of attention and affection and basically has it about as good as it gets for a dog. Today we left to run some errands and left her in the house because it was starting to get dark and cold outside. We were gone for no more than an hour and came home to find that she had POOPED IN OUR BED!!!! WTF??!!! Not just one pile but all over the bed in multiple places! She has never done anything like that before. I was furious! She is sleeping outside tonight, the little ungrateful brat. I am so mad!!

Warm, Sunny Snow Day!

I LOVE this time of year, we get snow but it is a treat because the sun is out and it is warm by the next day. We had so much fun playing in the snow yesterday, I actually went and picked Katie up from school early so she could enjoy it before it all melted. It was 60 degrees and sunny, without a cloud in the sky. Standing in the sun it was actually hot, we stripped off our hats and coats almost immediately. We rode sleds down the hill in our back yard, made a snow man, had a snowball fight, made snow angels, ate snow - I couldn't get Kobe to STOP eating it. lol

We got to really have fun and enjoy the snow without the cold. Today it is all completely melted off and it's supposed to be in the 70's this weekend. This is why I love living in the mountains. Denver didn't even get any snow at all!








More pics (including all our pics from the last few weeks) at: http://kcmillerfamily.shutterfly.com/

Stupid in America

I've been doing a lot of research trying to figure out the best thing to do for Katie regarding her schooling. I came across this video and am just speechless. It's long but VERY worth watching.

Crazy Weather

Sunday it was in the high 70's and we spent the entire day outside on the playground....

Then this morning we woke up to this...

The sun is out now and this will probably all be melted off by this afternoon. I have never seen such crazy weather!

Torn

I apologize in advance that this will probably be long, rambling and boring. I just have some things weighing on my mind that I need to get out. The thing that is conflicting me is Katie's school. Last year we tried homeschooling and it worked wonderfully in the beginning when I had the time to put into it. Kaleb wasn't born yet, I hadn't started Hip Monkey and I could actually devote a good chunk of time each day to homeschooling. Katie was happy and learning and I loved it as well. The relaxed pace of our days, the time spent together as a family, the freedom to be able to go places during the week days, I truly loved it. Then in 2nd semester it all just went downhill. I decided to start a new business which consumed nearly all of my time, Kaleb was born and all the demands of a newborn came along with him. Between the 2 little ones and trying to start and run a new business with ZERO help, I just didn't have any time to put towards Katie's schooling. I would try to get her to read or do worksheets while I worked, but without my supervision she would fight me on it and stall and not do the work and I'd end up getting mad at her and it would just turn into this negative dynamic between us and we'd both be frustrated and short with each other. I decided then that homeschooling just wasn't working and that we'd put her in school in the fall. So we did, and while I've had mixed feelings about it all along, things are definitely taking a turn for the worse. Aside from hating the rushed mornings, the drop off, the pick up, hardly ever seeing Katie anymore, now I'm concerned about the quality of the education she is receiving there. The school is really small which is what initially attracted me to it but now I'm thinking maybe it's a little too small. The 3rd grade only has 6 kids so they decided to combine it with 2nd grade which also has 6 kids. 12 kids in all isn't that much and still smaller than most public school classrooms. The problem is that I'm not sure how much time the teacher has to help and work with Katie when trying to teach 2 different grades. Katie has been coming home with a lot of mistakes on her papers, more than I have ever seen before. Yesterday she brought home a math paper that was only half finished, I asked her why she didn't finish it and she said the teacher only gives them 2 minutes to do the paper and she doesn't know how to do it. I went over the concept with her for a few minutes until she "got it" and then asked her to try the paper again and she was easily able to do it. I asked her why she didn't ask her teacher how to do it if she was having a problem and she said that she's not allowed to ask questions because the teacher is busy teaching the 2nd grade while the 3rd graders do their work. WTF?! She can't ask questions?? I've been thinking pretty seriously about it and I'm starting to feel like she is only getting half a teacher - yet we are paying full tuition! So I'm starting to feel a little concerned about the quality of education she is getting there.

I've also been thinking a lot about how much my situation has changed since last Spring. I now have a full time nanny to help me with the little ones. Kaleb is getting older and easier now than when he was a newborn. I have Marie helping with all the customer service work. I have a LOT more free time now than I did last Spring when I decided I couldn't continue to homeschool. Couple this with the increasing dissatisfaction I am having with her current school and now I'm starting to wonder if we should give homeschooling another shot? I'm so torn about this. She seems to like her school, although I sat in her room last night with her for about an hour talking and she said that she would much rather go back to homeschooling and wouldn't miss her school at all. This is tearing me up so much, I literally feel like I have a knot in my stomach. I just want to do what is best for her and for all of us but I just don't know what that is. I hate to keep moving her around, the poor kid has never finished an entire year at the same school. But on the other hand, I don't want to keep her in less than ideal situation if I could offer her something better at home. I really do miss homeschooling a lot and think that with the current situation I would be able to give it the time required for it to be fun and sucessful. So, do I pull her out? Do I wait till the end of the semester? Do I let her finish the year and then consider homeschooling for next year? Ugh. I wish I just knew what the right thing to do is that will be best for her now and in the long run.

For Angela (and anyone else who likes SNL) - My all time favorite skit

*Warning - don't watch if you get offended easily and/or don't enjoy vulgar humor!

Can you go one week without spending any money?

After reviewing our finances and deciding we spend way too much money on non-necessity purchases, I decided to issue a challenge -to go one week and not spend a single dime except for necessities like gas and groceries. My hope is that it will be a sort of boot camp in frugality. Waste not, want not...reduce, reuse, recycle and all that. So for the next 7 days there will be no more Starbucks, no Jamba Juice, no snacks while getting gas, no eating out at restaurants, no Amazon purchases, no movie rentals, etc. Kevin will take his lunch to work. If we want to do something fun, it will have to be free. If we put all the money we spent each month on that crap in a savings account it could probably pay for our kids college! Do we really need all that stuff? No. Will it be hard to give up? Probably. It should be interesting!

We did a practice run over the weekend. We wanted to go to the zoo on Saturday but instead decided to take the kids fishing and for a hike. It was a lot of fun and probably saved us close to $100 we would have spent on gas, tickets and food at the zoo. It was a good example of how you can still have just as much fun without spending money. Afterward we cheated and went to get barbecue at Hog Heaven though. ;) We are starting "for real" today though!

My Stalker

Yes, I have a stalker. He is completely obsessed with me. He is an odd stalker though, he is only 3ft tall and wears Batman underwear. He follows my every move and professes his love to me 100 times a day. The thing is, I love my stalker with all my heart, I just need a little space! If you haven't guessed by now, my stalker is Kobe. The boy takes the term "mama's boy" to a whole new level. He is my shadow, I can't leave the room without him running to follow me. If I need to run outside just to get something from the car, guess who must go with me? Going up or down stairs just to grab something? I have someone trailing behind me yelling "wait for me!". Need to run an errand to the store? I've got a buddy going with me. I haven't gone to the bathroom without an audience in I don't know how long. He will even sit in the dark next to me while I put Kaleb to bed. Seriously, isn't that weird? Wouldn't you think it would be more fun to hang out with his sister and dad and watch tv or something? Nope, he sits there silently (because he knows I'll kick him out of the room if he makes a peep) in the complete darkness, patiently waiting for me to get Kaleb to sleep. He never leaves my side. He also refuses to stay in his own bed, we got his room set up so cute with a little race car bed and everything. He loves it but only if I'm in there with him. Every night, without fail, I hear my door slam open and he climbs up in my bed. The problem is that Kaleb is usually already there and even though it's a King size bed, 4 people is a tight squeeze. It's also not good enough for him just to be in my bed, he also has to snuggle up next to me as close as humanly possible, I think he really wants to just climb back in my womb. When I turn on my side to nurse Kaleb he takes the opportunity to wedge himself into my back so tightly that it is physically impossible for me to roll back onto my back or reach around behind me to move him. As a result of this my neck, back and shoulder are killing me. It's hard to get upset about all this, he is so sweet about it and gives me about 100 hugs a day and tells me "I love you so,so,so,so,so,so MUCH!" and has starting holding my face in his hands and saying "Mama" in the most loving way. It's so sweet but sometimes I really want to stretch out in my bed for a couple hours and get some good sleep and maybe even take a relaxing shower without him standing in the bathroom asking me 100 times "are you done yet"? I treasure him so much, I know how incredibly lucky I am to have him here. I don't ever take that for granted and I love how much he wants to be with me. I feel bad complaining about anything but sometimes it just is a little much, especially the night time thing. I'm literally sleep deprived and in physical pain. I'm just not sure how to get him to stay in his own bed without creating a huge drama or making him feel unloved or unwanted. I love my little stalker, I just need some sleep!

Broken by Lifehouse

I've never had song sing so true to how my heart feels. Missing you so much bubby.

The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time
And I am here still waiting, though I still have my doubts
I am damaged at best like you’ve already figured out

I’m falling apart, barely breathing
With a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holding on
I’m barely holding on to you

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded but I’m an open book instead
And I still see your reflection inside of my eyes
That are looking for purpose they’re still looking for life

I’m falling apart, barely breathing
With a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holding on
I’m barely holding on to you

I’m hanging on another day
Just to see what you will throw my way
And I’m hanging on to the words you say
You said that I will, I will be okay

Broken lights on the freeway left me here alone
I may have lost my way now; haven’t forgotten my way home
I’m falling apart, barely breathing
With a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holding on
I’m barely holding on to you

Warning....Extreme Cuteness Ahead

Introducing Padme Amadala, K-Obe Wan Kenobe (get it?) & Yoda :)

Halloween costumes arrived in the mail today. We are doing a Star Wars theme and Kevin and I are even going to dress up. I'm going to be Leia & Kevin is Darth Vader. If Kyle was here, he would have been Luke Skywalker. I always imagine his costume every year along with everyone else's.

Are they not the cutest thing ever?!

The #1 killer that has no "awareness"

Everywhere I turn I see awareness ribbons for Breast Cancer, Autism, Prostate Cancer, you name it, it has a campaign behind it. Yet the #1 killer of children and the most preventable of them all is completely ignored - automobile accidents. I found the following stats while trying (unsuccessfully) to find some kind of online support group for people who have lost loved ones in a car crash...

In 2003 117 people each day were killed in crashes, one every 12 minutes. To give a sense of scale to this problem, 117 people per day is as if a nearly full 737 airplane crashed each day with no survivors.

So many people are killed in automobile accidents, so many families have lost loved ones due to this epidemic, yet there are no support groups, no awareness ribbons, nothing. It's insane. Sometimes I feel like we have made so much progress with getting Kyle's story out there, the youtube video, the news interviews, the Foundation. Then I realize there is SO much more that needs to be done, it's overwhelming. This is the biggest killer in our nation and no one seems to even care. Everyone wants to find a cure for breast cancer but nobody seems concerned about preventing the tens of thousands of deaths due to reckless drivers. Why does everyone worry about getting cancer or heart disease but then think that a fatal car accident could never happen to them. It's the most likely thing to kill you and your children of them all!

*When I say "nobody", I mean the general society as whole. I know there are people who DO care greatly - probably you if you are reading this blog :) and just wish everyone could feel that way and the media would put a huge spotlight on this enormous problem like they have with breast cancer (which kills LESS people each year than car accidents by the way).

There are so many things that could be done, better driver training programs, more frequent testing for driver's license renewal, TV ad campaigns about the importance of car seats, higher testing standards for car seats, etc. It's just so frustrating to have lost a child at the hands of the biggest killer in the country and not even be able to find a simple support group or awareness ribbon for it but be constantly bombarded with those things for every other "cause" under the sun. Maybe I should just make my own. Sigh.

Room Addition & Kobe's new look

From Front of the house (main deck) looking at covered side deck and entrance to the dining room addition

Inside the dining room addition - hard to get the whole room in one pic

Well my dad finished building the room addition and roof over the side deck, looks pretty nice huh? He did boxed up ceilings on both which looks really nice and makes it feel even bigger. Kevin still needs to stain the outside to match the rest of the house and insulate and sheetrock the inside but it is almost completely done! Soon we will be able to open it up to the rest of the house and have a whole new kitchen, I can't wait! Oh and yes the roof is two different colors, that is just temporary because we are putting a whole new roof on the house but have only done the part over the room addition so far.

Yesterday I noticed the kids were in the bathroom with the door closed. Figuring they were up to mischief, I grabbed the camera and caught them in the act....

Whatchya guys doing? I took a picture in the mirror when I first opened the door, check out the busted look on Katie's face. lol

How is a mom expected to be stern and not laugh at this?

What can you do in 90 days?

I've reached a point where I am so sick of the shape I am in (or not in) and need some serious motivation. I've heard really good things about this program called P90x, it is a 90 day program that guarantees to have you ripped by the end of the program. It's not some silly "5 minutes a day and your fit!" BS thing like most home workouts, it's serious and pretty hard core, an hour a day 7 days a week. The great thing is that all you need is dumbbells & a pull up bar. I'm not big on machines at the gym so I think this will work perfect for me. Kevin & I both decided to take the challenge so I went ahead and ordered the system and plan on starting it as soon as we get it. Hopefully we can keep each other motivated and in 90 days will both be in awesome shape. I'm going to take some before pics of both of us and then take pics periodically through the next 90 days. Hopefully the "after" pics will look a lot different than the "before"! I figure 3 months are going to come and go anyway, why not do something with that time to make a big change in my life, appearance and health? Anyway, I'll update with our progress as we go. :)

My Music

Stole this from Marie :)

A pal of mine blogged about an email she received asking her for a favor. Apparently her friend's social anthropology class project for the semester is finding out what makes people tick. The idea is to tap into people's play list and see...well, what makes them tick. What's their jam? What makes them get going in the morning or for a run?

So, I've posted 10 of my songs, chosen at random thanks to iTunes shuffle and explained my reasons. I thought it was sort of fun and hopefully not too embarrassing. You should do the same!

1.Magic Carpet Ride by Steppenwolf
Does any song on the planet rock more than this song? Show me a person who can sit still when this song is on.

2. Bitch by Meredith Brooks
This is my running jam, nothing gets me to pick up the pace like this song. I must have run hundreds of miles while listening to this song, it's been on my MP3 player for years and it still rocks. "I'm a bitch, I'm a lover I'm a child, I'm a mother I'm a sinner, I'm a saint I do not feel ashamed"

3. Fortunate Son by CCR (Creedence Clear Water Revival)
It has an awesome beat and I love the lyrics. CCR is one of my top 3 favorite bands of all time, they have so many awesome songs. I think I was born in the wrong decade.

4. Fighter by Christina Aguilera
This is towards the end of my playlist and really gets me to kick it into high gear and not quit running when I'm getting tired.

5. Take it Easy - Eagles
I love the Eagles, they are one of the greatest bands of all times. This is my favorite "cruisin" song. It wouldn't be a road trip without an Eagles CD.

6. Tiny Dancer - Elton John
This is the most beautiful song. I used to dance with Kyle when he was baby to this song so it holds a special place in my heart.

7. Landslide - Stevie Nix
I love Stevie Nix's voice, I grew up listening to her because my parents liked her and the love got passed on to me.

8. Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd
Who doesn't like this song? This song reminds me of playing pool in highschool with my friends and underage drinking. lol

9. Danny's Song by Kenny Loggins
I love this song because it reminds me that I have all I need in my family. I used to listen to this song when we were poor and in college raising 2 kids and could relate to it so much because even though we were poor, we were blissfully happy. " And even though we ain't got money, I'm so in love with ya honey, And everything will bring a chain of love. And in the morning when I rise, you bring a tear of joy to my eyes, And tell me everything is gonna be alright."

10. Jack & Diane - John Melloncamp
Another one of my highschool memory songs, so many parties with this tune on... It's just a fun jam that never loses it's appeal.

It is obvious from my playlist that I am not remotely into "today's" music? The best music came from the late 60's & early 70's and nothing today even comes close. For some reason no Beatles songs came up but they are another one of my faves.

Field Trip from Hell...if Hell was in Antarctica

I guess I should preface this story by mentioning that Kevin wanted to watch a scary movie last night so of course he falls asleep 15 minutes into the movie but I stay up, watch the whole thing, get totally spooked and can't fall asleep until 3:00am....

7:00am - Katie comes into our bedroom telling us we need to get up to get ready for her field trip. Her class is going to "Miller Farm" in Longmont which is almost 2 hours away. Why they want to go to a farm 2 hours away is beyond me. I'm sure there are closer farms. Being the paranoid mom I am, I decide there is no way she is driving there with anyone but me and think that maybe it will be a fun trip for the boys. Hah. I'm exhausted from only getting 4 hours of sleep, my eyes feel like sandpaper and I desperately want to go back to sleep.

7:30am- Stumble out of the bedroom after Katie has come in 3 more times to tell me to get up. Check weather.com, it says it will be 65 degrees and partly cloudy. Sounds nice, I pack light jackets. Rushing around like mad to get 3 children dressed, fed and lunches packed for the day and everything packed in the car.

8:30am - Everyone is finally in the car and we are leaving, Kaleb is screaming and Kobe is crying because the back of his shirt isn't pulled down exactly perfect in his car seat (this is an ongoing issue with him). I'm already regretting this brilliant idea of taking all the kids on this field trip.

9:00am - Get to her school and start to follow the caravan of cars to Miller Farm.

9:30am - Kaleb is now screaming at full volume. He has an ear infection and I forgot that driving down the hill would probably hurt his ears. It's also really foggy and about 40 degrees. It will be warmer once we get there though, right? Lost the caravan during one the potty breaks - thank goodness for navigation.

11:00am - Finally get there after much crying and 2 potty stops. Start unpacking kids, strollers, diaper bag, etc. Worrying because it is still 40 degrees, cloudy and extremely windy and all I packed was light jackets. Cursing the liars on the weather channel, I bundle up the boys in the stroller as best I can and we all head in. Wait, where is my camera? I swear I brought it to the car.... search for 5 minutes and give up. Dang it, we drove all this way and now won't have any pics.

11:05am - Walk in and see Katie's entire school on the back of a "hayride" type tractor thing about to take off. Thinking they are just going on a ride around the farm and will be back in a few minutes, I tell Katie to run and catch up. She gets on and takes off. My dad, the boys and I wander around to explore the "farm", there's not much besides a couple goats and a little playground. The wind has picked up and is icy cold. We are shivering and trying to take shelter behind an old shed. I'm thinking as soon as Katie gets back we will take off because it's just way too cold.

12:30pm - After a completely miserable, freezing, boring HOUR AND A HALF later, Katie's "hayride" finally returns. Turns out the "hayride" WAS the field trip. They took the kids way out to all the various fields and let them pick vegetables. Katie comes back with 2 bags of corn, carrots, potatoes and a pumpkin. The good news is that she had fun. I'm sure we would have too if we would have gone. Anything would have been better than shivering behind an old shed with two cold, miserable little ones.

12:45 - We quickly scarf down the lunch we packed, shivering the whole time because the wind has picked up and we are literally shaking while we eat.

1:00 - Run to the car, shove everything in, get kids buckled up and get the heck out of there.

3:00 - Finally get home after another 2 hour scream filled, multiple potty break drive with not even a cute picture to show.

Why, oh why didn't I just stay in bed?

Taos

CLICK ON PICS TO ENLARGE

We took a spur of the moment trip to Taos, NM to meet up with our friends the Parkers. Katie had Thurs. and Fri off school due to her school moving classrooms around so we decided to make the most of our 4 day weekend and take a trip. Taos is halfway between us and the Parkers so we found a vacation house for rent and spent 4 wonderful days just relaxing and having fun. We went hiking, the guys went fishing and mostly we just hung out and enjoyed spending time together. Every morning the guys got up and made awesome breakfasts and they also made delicious dinners every night! Yes, I know Marie & I are totally spoiled. One night we stayed up and had Margaritas and just talked and laughed which brought back memories of so many other Margarita nights before. :) The kids had a great time playing and swimming in the hot tub (or "hot bath" as Kobe called it). It was so much fun and I really, really wish we could do it more often.